Is Benny The Bull The Best Mascot?

(Getty/Anadolu Agency)

Not only is Benny the Bull the oldest and often ranked best NBA mascot (1, 2, 3), but he was even crowned most popular sports mascot in America by Forbes in 2013.

And what’s not to love? He’s a world-class dunker, rocks one stunner of a unibrow, and looks so damn smooth in that classic Chicago jersey.

Still not a believer? Well, here are 12 of the best Benny the Bull moments from around the internet. We dare you to not fall in love.

When the rhythm gets you.

Whatcha guys lookin at?

He's right behind, isn't he...

No words. Just emotions.

???? Turnaround, bullseye. Every now and then I fall apart ????

Christmas spirit should never be subtle.

Son of a...

That'll teach you to sell popcorn around here, pal.

If you see him, it's already too late.

When your seats are at the end of a rainbow.

Brow game strong.

Prince Charming Level: 100

FACT: Countless Children Get Totally Owned By Piñatas Every Year

(Getty/kali9)

Marketed as a traditional birthday activity, the piñata is actually a ticking time bomb of terror. It taunts weak-minded children into a frenzy with its colorful exterior and sweet, candied innards, knowing full well that a 6-year-old with such paltry motor skills has no business wielding an aluminum baseball bat that size.

The following is a record of just a few children who were lured into the fearsome piñata’s clutches. While some make it out alive with their dignity intact, others aren’t so lucky.

Gloves off, mouse. Let's do this for real.

I'm already 5 moves ahead, you candy-filled son of a bitch.

Making an example.

Direct hit! Where's the candy?

The irony of getting annihilated by an emergency response vehicle.

I have no quarrel with you, friendly neighborhood piñata.

#hubris

What's even more fun than a piñata? Whiplash.

Kid uses colorful baton. It's not very effective...

Uncleanable: Official Trailer

Our house will never feel clean again after watching this…

Subscribe to The Dad on Youtube

 

Making Micro Cars With Panorama Shots

(Twitter/vaguefrisbee)

When Twitter’s @vaguefrisbee shared how moving vehicles tend to look a bit goofy in panorama shots, a slew of others quickly began revealing their own panor-antics.

Have you ever taken a panorama that left you scratching your head?

Other Dads: The Uninvited Guest

Every Gary you meet is already 3 beers deep.

Subscribe to The Dad on Youtube

Father Figures: Number One

“My father was an NFL athlete, fireman, and owner of a battery business. The quintessential quiet, humble, strong type that you don’t see much of anymore. I grew up assuming all dads had calloused hands and played catch after work.

His sense of humor was dry and subtle, much of which I surely wouldn’t understand until I got older, and subsequently employed myself.

When he spoke, it was with purpose and consideration. When he spoke, you listened. He also did plenty of listening himself. His love and care was deep beyond measure that I witnessed elsewhere.

One day, when I was 11, is ingrained into my memory. He arrived home to my mother crying. I’d argued beyond reason with her about attending a field trip after missing a week of school while sick.

He calmly sat me down and, with purpose, quite sternly explained that this would be the last time I made her cry.

“I want to make one thing clear. This is the last time you will make your mother cry. Remember, I chose her, I did not choose you. She is number one.”

Knowing his unflinching dedication and commitment as a father, this sentence was my first awakening into what love was, and an early glimpse at healthy priorities. He may not remember, but it stayed with me, and drives who I strive to be as a husband today, and a father one day. ”

– Matt Whittington

Want to share a story about fatherhood? Email [email protected]

German Twister

Dog Uses Dog As Stool

When Reality Doesn’t Get Close To Expectations

(Twitter/lilgautama)

Given the current era of FAKE NEWS, you’d think people would be more wary of simply accepting advertisements at face value. However, whether due to a lack of research or getting flat-out swindled, people continue to receive products that don’t meet or even resemble their expectations.

Let these hilariously awful social media posts serve as a warning to the adorably gullible consumers out there.

When you want to go straight from the gym to the club.

Just how I like it: Undercooked, yet still burnt.

Too small AND no bikini model? Bogus.

Adorable. I wonder why they're on sale?

You want more than 1 oz of juice? In this economy?

I'm calling the police.

He sees you when you're sleeping...

I've had nightmares more pleasant than this.

(Amazon)

The terror of the neighborhood.

Not to brag, but I literally swam 1,000 laps today.

Dad Therapy: Going Bald

The only thing worse than going bald? When your kid notices you’re going bald.

Subscribe to The Dad on Youtube

 

Subway Stranger Helps Dedicated Dad With Common Core

Helping your kids with their homework is no parent’s idea of a good time, and that was before common core entered the picture and changed the rules on us.

Truth be told, I don’t remember any math after sixth grade, and now that kids are using tens and being forced to solve formerly simple arithmetic by drawing boxes, I’m completely useless. Sometimes it feels like you need to go back to school just to be able to help your kids get through it!

One dad is doing the next best thing, boning up on the principles of mathematics that his young son is struggling with just so he can help the youngster with his homework. That’s some A+ dadding!

Corey Simmons just wants to help his kid get the hang of fractions, and in order to give him the support he needs, Corey went back to re-learn math he probably hasn’t looked at in twenty years. They say YouTube is a handy resource when it comes to this kind of stuff, but sometimes the wifi isn’t working. Like when you’re commuting on the subway.

That’s where Corey was one afternoon when he found himself frustrated by those fractions. He didn’t have the internet to help, but he did have the kindness of strangers. One stranger in particular – a former math teacher who happened to be sharing the subway with Corey that day and noticed the dedicated dad’s confusion.

Denise Wilson witnessed the exchange and shared the story on Facebook:

“So today omw from work the guy in the red sat down opend up his folder and started reading a few stops later the guy next to him sat down and asked him what he’s studying you look a little confused maybe i can help he says his son failed a math test they’re learning fractions so im just teaching myself this over again so i can help him im 42 & dont know any of this so im re teaching myself the guy in the black informed him he use to be a math teacher so he asked the guy to quiz him and everything he got wrong or was confused about he broke it down and corrected him by the end of my train ride the guy in the red had a better understanding he can bring home a new method and teach his child i really love seeing shit like this especially in New York because we really just dont give a fuck about what the person next to us is going thru ❤”

Wilson recounted the scene for CBS News and admitted the whole thing got to her emotionally. “I started tearing up,” Wilson told CBS. “It was just one person helping another, and I thought that was beautiful.”

The post has been shared over 40,000 times since April.

 

Bear Knocks Over Bird Feeder

5 Things THE KARATE KID Taught Me About Parenting

The Karate Kid is one of my favorite movies of all time. (No, not the Jaden Smith one. I will crane kick your ass!)

When I was a kid, I saw the original in the theater (I’m old!) at least three times – once because I wasn’t allowed to see Red Dawn yet and had to “settle” – and dozens more on VHS.

Recently, I showed it to my 7-year-old, knowing full well that he was too young for some of the themes – he’s encountered a little bullying, but nothing like the beatings Cobra Kai inflicts on Daniel, and he doesn’t understand or have any interest in the social dynamics of teenagers – but he liked it enough that he’s been quoting parts of it.

(It’s not my favorite thing when he sees me changing his baby brother and he yells out “GET HIM A BODY BAG!” but it’s not NOT my favorite thing.)

Anyway, I was a kid when I saw it but I’m not a kid now, and watching it as a father was a different experience. I learned a few things.

5 Things The Karate Kid Taught Me About Parenting

    • It’s probably not a good idea to let an aggro, racist war vet with PTSD mentor your children

The Karate Kid GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

    • Forcing kids to do manual labor around your house under the guise of karate training is a next level parenting hack

Karate Kid GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

    • Beating the shit out of your kids’ bullies is totally badass and not at all something that would be frowned upon by their wealthy parents or local law enforcement
    • Remember when an entire roomful of country clubbers laughs hysterically at Daniel – a teenage boy – when he gets a tray of spaghetti spilled on him? Rich people are THE WORST!

    Karate Kid GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

  • While it’s definitely tough for a young kid to move across the country and have to acclimate to a new environment and challenging social scene, especially in the middle of high school, let’s not lose sight of the sacrifices made by his single mother, who was doing whatever she could for her family – including uprooting her son from his comfortable, familiar existence to a potentially more fertile economic environment – all in the service of providing for him and trying to give him access to a brighter future. The dude went to Japan in the sequel! If he were still in Newark he’d be driving a cab. They should have called it The Karate Kid‘s Underappreciated Mom!
  • via GIPHY

    Yeah. Movies change when you have kids.