I spend my days waiting for my next meal and I don't know when that changed

Roughly the same amount of time it takes to get me out of the bathroom so I get it

Have you met our kids

Even if you try option A, it's almost always going to be option B.

At this point it feels intentional

Great so I'll just clear my next week or so, thanks

You know what you did.


Take him to IKEA and just see what happens

"5 more minutes!"

How will I ever recover from this

The last place they'll ever check