12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From July

Best Dad Jokes Memes of July

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. One Trip Only

2. Bricked

3. Driven

4. Bed Crime

5. Meme Lord

6. No Tip For You

7. Early Bird

8. Not Joking

9. Decks

10. Safe Room

11. Crime

12. Undeveloped

Check out last month’s top memes here.

The Dad Law: The Definitive Rule Book for All Things Dad

The Dad Law Book
(The Dad)

Fatherhood comes with it a plethora of guidelines. If your kid hands you a toy phone, you answer that toy phone. If your kid is thirsty, you are Friday. For thousands of years, these rules have been unwritten. Until now.

Introducing: THE DAD LAW.

(The Dad)

From road trip etiquette to pun regulations, this gorgeous leather-bound book is the most thorough briefing on every do, don’t, and duh pertaining to fatherhood. Is it okay to let your kid win in Mario Kart? When to use cool your jets vs hold your horses? It’s all in this bad boy.

Here are a few choice excerpts:

It’s the authority on language…

healthy road rage…

less healthy eating habits…

workplace motivation…

light goofing…

and facilitating a sense of community.

There are also plenty of cool illustrations within, including tong diagrams…

(The Dad)

and visual aids for embarrassing puns.

(The Dad)

Click right here to snag a copy for a measly $22 (because we know “money doesn’t grow on trees”, “you’re not made of money,” etc) and explore 202 whole pages of these silly, sweet, and painful universal truths about fatherhood with your very own copy of THE DAD LAW!

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From June

Best Dad Jokes Memes June 2020

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. Dad Tax

2. Dad Rocks

3. Grilled

4. Getting Serious

5. Vengeance 

6. Freedom

7. Proper

8. Reboot

9. Dark Ages

10. Not a Lot to Ask

11. Summer Dadding

12. Junior Millionaire 

Check out last month’s top memes here.

“Tom’s Bad Dad Jokes” Provide Some Much-Needed Groan-Laughs

Tom’s “Bad Dad Jokes” Provide Some Much-Needed Groan-Laughs
(Facebook/ TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

In COVID times, it’s tough to find any kind of respite from the stress of daily life. With most of our favorite activities canceled indefinitely, it’s important to find some kind of joy wherever we can. One Maryland man has taken it upon himself to bring a little bit of laughter into the lives of his neighbors in the form of his “Bad Dad Jokes”, because, you know – laughter is the best medicine (unless you’re actually sick).

A couple of weeks into the maddening uncertainty of quarantine, even Tom Schruben, a generally optimistic man, was losing a bit of his spark. His wife heard that a friend had started posting dad jokes in her front yard, and thought a bit of humor might be just the thing to revitalize her husband’s cheerful demeanor. Tom figured it wouldn’t hurt to try (and humoring your wife is almost never a bad idea), so he posted a joke on a whiteboard, in the middle of his lawn across from a busy walking path. Within the first hour, a passerby stopped to look at the joke Tom had written and laughed – and “Tom’s Bad Dad Jokes” was born.

Tom is in his fourth month of telling Bad Dad Jokes and has no plans of stopping any time soon. He is reminded daily of the huge impact his jokes have on his community and beyond, which makes posting his daily jokes both exciting and rewarding. Tom explains, “Many people have stopped to tell me that it has become an important part of their day. I have gotten letters of thanks in the mail and a woman taped a note to my sign saying how she walks past each day and likes the sign because it makes her think of her father who loved bad puns. She takes a picture to share with her friends and she said it puts a smile on many faces.”

Coping during stressful times is nothing new to Tom, who has dealt with more than his share of grief in life. After losing two of his six children, Tom realized just how important it is to not only keep going but to do so in a way that makes life worth living. Tom leaves us with an important reminder about the power of positivity: “Something that I have learned through my grief is that happiness is in large part a choice that each of us makes – sometimes you have to push to find it in yourself – and sometimes small gestures, even silly ones can make a big difference.”

Here are some of our favorites from “Tom’s Bad Dad Jokes” collection to help you reach your daily groan-laugh quota:

Bad Dad Joke #70: Boomerang

(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

Bad Dad Joke #63: Hare Line

(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

Bad Dad Joke #62: Snickers

(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

Bad Dad Joke #33: Cinderella

(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

Bad Dad Joke #42: Eat a Clock

(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

Bad Dad Joke #16: Peek-a-Boo

Bad Dad Joke 6
(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

Bad Dad Joke #25: Faux Pa

(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

Bad Dad Joke #31: Mathamachicken

(Facebook/TOM'S BAD DAD JOKES)

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From May

Best Dad Memes of May

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. Hug Drug

2. Shhhhhhhh

3. Playtime

4. GOAT

5. Super

6. Shhhhhh

7. Peace Out

8. Name Game

9. Wakey, Wakey

10. Shhhhh

11. Inspirational

12. Shhhhh

Check out last month’s top memes here.

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From April

12 Best Dad Memes from April

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. Not Impressed

2. Breaking

3. Mother Natured

4. No Requests Please

5. Rookie Mistake

6. Talladega’d

7. Dada the Explorer

8. Quiet

9. Fuel

10. Executive Chef

11. Goldfish

12. Betrayed 

Check out last month’s top memes here.

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From March

Best Meme Dad Jokes of March 2022

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. Rookie Mistake

2. Inferno

3. Inhumane

4. Twist my Arm

5. Apple/Tree

6. Great Responsibility

7. Risky Business

8. Committed Roomies

9. Lettuce Appreciate This

10. Sneak Attack

11. Chip Seduction

12. RIP

Check out last month’s top memes here.

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From February

Best Dad Jokes February 2020

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. Folding

2. Background

3. Puling Over

4. Nap Time

5. Hell

6. Wardrobe

7. Classic

8. Raccoon

9. Give It a Rest

10. Ps and Qs

11. Performance Art

12. Lucasfun

Check out last month’s top memes here.

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From January

Our Best Dad Jokes From January

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. Poof

2. Kylow Energy

3. Cowabunga

4. Off the Hook

5. Food for Thought

6. Don’t Poke the Bear

7. Un-surence

8. No Jacket Required

9. Fair Warning

10. Don’t Do It

11. Don’t Care

12. Warning

Check out last month’s top memes here.

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From December

12 Best Dad Jokes of December

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. No Rest for the Wicked

2. He Sits on a Throne of Lies

3. Elf Sprint

4. Dad’s Best Friend

5. Will Regret This Later

6. Drama

7. Genius

8. And Noisemakers

9. Dialing…

10. No Mercy

12. Balanced Diet

Check out last month’s top memes here.

12 of Our Best Dad Jokes (Memes) From November

Our Best Memes of the Month

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. 20/80 Rule

2. Adventurous Eaters

3. Morning Person

4. Change the Channel

5. Didn’t Do My Research

6. This IS Christmas Music

7. Suspect Has Been ID’d

8. Careers

9. Yelling Match

10. Origins of Cool

11. Ooops

12. Curtains

Check out last month’s top memes here.

Savage Dad Pranks Family With Nuclear Emergency Broadcast Alert

Dad Pranks Family Nuclear Alert
(YouTube/Viral Hog)

What dad doesn’t love a good prank, especially at the expense of their family?

I’m not much of a prankster – there’s way too much planning involved for me to bother – but I’m heavy with the sarcasm and will occasionally make up outlandish lies just to see if I can convince my kids of silly stuff. It works a fair amount; children are stupid.

Most of my jokes are good-natured and harmless. Unlike the dad in this new viral video, who staged an elaborate emergency alert message for his family and effectively paralyzed them with fear with an eerily plausible scenario.

Essentially, he makes them think World War 3 is underway and that they’d better get to a fallout shelter lickety-split.

The family is scattered around the room, doing stuff, going about their business, when suddenly whatever is being watched on the TV is interrupted by the familiar sounds of a broadcast alert. They stop what they’re doing and gather to hear what’s happening, whereupon an official sounding voice informs them that North Korea has launched 3 ICBMs at Los Angeles, Chicago, and New York City. The voice advises viewers to evacuate and find the nearest fallout shelter before the missiles detonate.

The family stands there, watching in disbelief despite clearly believing it all – one of the women exasperatedly exclaims, “Frickin’ North Korea!”

Finally, at the end of the video, Dad – who’s been standing offscreen, silently taking in his family’s reactions – starts laughing, giving the game away. His family is none too pleased, nor should they be. The dude staged a 21st century War of the Worlds broadcast and they bought it hook, line and sinker.

To be honest, I’m not even sure this prank qualifies as “funny,” because it’s all too plausible and effectively rendered. And the only person laughing is the dad, because everyone else is realizing they have no idea where the nearest fallout shelter is and that they have no idea what to do.

The good news is, the kids in the room clearly didn’t quite grasp what they were hearing. And, of course, there is no need to head for shelter. Except for the dad who staged the prank. They seem pretty damn pissed at him!

101 of the Worst Puns to Make Your Family Cringe

101 Bad Dad Puns
(Getty/alvarez)

It’s an oft-quoted line that puns are the lowest form of wit. To that I say, I think we can go lower. We’ve put together a list of 101 of the absolute groaniest puns around. Next time your kid is embarrassed because you refused to drop them off a block away from school, these are what you shout from the window to make it worse.

1. A man sued an airline company after they couldn’t find his luggage. He lost his case.

2. Why couldn’t the sesame seed leave the poker table? He was on a roll.

3. Did you hear about the man who tried to catch fog? He mist.

4. I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well, it’s actually more of a wrap.

5. Why did the can crusher quit his job? It was soda pressing.

6. Last week I called someone a watering hole, but I meant well.

7. Yeah, I steal brake fluid. But I can stop anytime.

8. The definition of a will? It’s a dead giveaway.

9. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

10. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.

11. How much money does a pirate pay for corn? A buccaneer.

12. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.

13. Don’t interrupt someone working on a puzzle. You’ll hear some crosswords.

14. Why was King Arthur’s army too tired to fight? It had too many sleepless knights.

15. All these sea monster jokes are Kraken me up.

16. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.

17. What do you call a pig that does karate? Pork chop.

18. What do you get when two dinosaurs crash their cars? A T-Wrecks.

19. What job did the frog have at the hotel? Bellhop.

20. What do you call an everyday potato? A commentator.

21. How do you put a baby alien to sleep? You rocket.

22. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.

23. What did the volcano say to his wife? I lava you.

24. What do you call and owl that does magic? Hoodini.

25. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.

26. What do you call a classy salmon? Sofishticated.

27. What do you call a bear with no teeth? Gummybear.

28. How do you organize a space party? You planet.

29. What do you call and alligator in a vest? An investigator.

30. What sound does a sleeping T-Rex make? A dino-snore.

31. Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind, it’s tearable.

32. I dreamed I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. But it was just a Fanta sea.

33. I got fired as train engineer. They tallied up all my accidents, it was so hard to keep track.

34. Accidentally buried someone alive. It was a grave mistake.

35. I had to clean out all my spices. What a waste of thyme.

36. What do you call a laughing motorcycle? Yamahahaha.

37. A friend of mine annoyed me with bird puns. But toucan play at that game.

38. A termite walks into a bar and says, “Where is the bar tender?”

39. I told my friend I was going to make a bike out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face when I rode straight pasta.

40. What’s the worst part about movie theater candy prices? They’re always raisinet.

41. Why is peter pan always flying? He neverlands.

42. What did the librarian say when the books were a mess? We ought to be ashamed of ourshelves.

43. Why did the police go to a daycare center? A 3-year-old was resisting a rest.

44. Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.

45. Did you hear the rumor about peanut butter? I’m not telling you. You might spread it.

46. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.

47. Why couldn’t the sesame seed leave the poker table? A: He was on a roll.

48. I sent ten puns into a contest hoping one would win. No pun in ten did.

49. How much room should you give fungi to grow? As mushroom as possible.

50. I cut my finger shredding cheese, but I think I may have grater problems.

51. How do trees get online? They just log in.

52. Why are dogs bad storytellers? Because they only have one tale.

53. Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.

54. Why do hamburgers go to the gym? To get better buns.

55. What do you do when life gives you melons? See a doctor, you’re probably dyslexic.

56. It was a terrible summer for Humpty Dumpty. But he had a great fall.

57. A Chinese restaurant got vandalized. It was an act of wonton destruction.

58. What do you call a dishonest noodle? An Impasta.

59. What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.

60. Where are average products made? The satisfactory.

61. Mummifying puns are so disheartening.

62. Why does a chicken coop have two doors? If it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.

63. Why shouldn’t you mention the number 288? It’s two gross.

64. Why did the mathematician’s numeral keep ending up in the wrong place? It was Roman.

65. What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line.

66. How do you get down from an elephant? You don’t. You get down from a goose.

67. Why should you never breakup with a goalie? Because he’s a keeper.

68. Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.

69. How do you keep a bagel from getting away? Put lox on it.

70. A criminal’s best asset is his lie ability.

71. Which is faster, heat or cold? Heat, you can catch cold.

72. I gave a valuable comb to a bald friend. He’ll never part with it.

73. Why couldn’t the circus replace their human cannonball? They couldn’t find another man of his caliber.

74. Why do bicycles fall over? Because they’re two-tired.

75. What did the ill comic say in the hospital? I’m here … all weak.

76. I named my dogs Rolex and Timex. They’re watchdogs.

77. Advanced math is easy as pi.

78. Why does coffee hate mornings? It keeps getting mugged.

79. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

80. What did the grape say when he got stepped on? Nothing, he just let out a little whine.

81. Life as an elevator repairman has its ups and downs.

82. Learning to sleep upside down is hard for bats, but they get the hang of it.

83. Waking up is an eye-opening experience.

84. I used to be a banker, until I lost interest.

85. Why couldn’t the coffee go out? It was grounded.

86. No matter how hard you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.

87. When I get undressed in the bathroom, the shower usually gets turned on.

88. Why are teddy bears never hungry? They’re always stuffed.

89. I used to be a shoe salesman, until they gave me the boot.

90. It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

91. Will glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen.

92. I knew a mathematician who couldn’t afford lunch. He could binomial.

93. Where do robots go for fun? The circuits.

94. I accidentally ate food coloring. I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

95. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I’ll show you A-flat minor.

96. To solve claustrophobia you have to think outside the box.

97. What did the mermaid wear to math class? An algae-bra.

98. Only small babies are delivered by stork, the big ones need a crane.

99. If you ever feel cold just stand in a corner. They’re usually around 90 degrees.

100. I just heard they won’t be making rulers any longer.

101. By shear coincidence, all these sheep look the same.

Check out our list of the 101 best puns in the world.

Can’t get enough of corny dad jokes? How about 101 knock-knock jokes to help you along!