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Crikey! Steve Irwin’s Commentary of Monster Hunter World Is a Beauty [WATCH]

Steve Irwin Narrates Video Game
(Getty/Frederick M. Brown /Capcon)

Steve Irwin was a true gem in the wildlife conservation community. His insights were only rivaled by his genuine love for nature and the animals that reside in it.

With that in mind, YouTuber Vinnie Paizan recently saw the perfect application for Steve’s sharpened animal acumen while playing a round of Monster Hunter World.

Pasting together audio clips from The Crocodile Hunter, Steve’s narration skills fit a little too perfectly as players take down a flying wyvern.

As one commenter so accurately put it, “This is why the internet was invented.”

Now, I don’t remember Steve ever attacking a croc with what looks to be a handheld artillery shotgun, but to be fair, I don’t think he ever encountered a fire-breathing one the size of a small apartment either.

Teens Wake up at 4am to Shovel Neighbor’s Driveway Before Her Dialysis

Teens Shovel at 4am
(Twitter/TweeterLanigan)

Most high school students take advantage of snow days by grabbing a few extra Z’s in the morning, but a special crew of teenagers from Parsippany High School in New Jersey recently went viral for doing something genuinely altruistic on their day off.

Brian Lanigan works as an EMT and knows his elderly next door neighbor because she routinely receives dialysis and requires ambulance transportation.

The previous week, Brian had shoveled her long driveway in order to make way for the ambulance, but with the forecast predicting eight more inches overnight, he knew she would need assistance once again.

Brian had to work early the next morning and wouldn’t be available, so he and his brother, Patrick, began recruiting friends with shovels to do something selfless.

The next morning at 4:30 A.M., four sleepy friends showed up ready to work. Within thirty minutes, the driveway was completely clear and ready for the ambulance’s arrival.

Brian and Patrick’s dad snapped a photo of the “snow angels” and posted it to Twitter, praising the boys for their willing hearts and overall awesomeness.

The post has received over 800 likes, with dozens of folks leaving heartfelt comments emphasizing that this is the way true men should act.

Well done, fellas! The first round of hot cocoa is on us.

Groaning Reddit Users Share Their Fathers’ Most Notorious Dad Jokes

(Getty/Marissa Powell)

Dad jokes are great. It’s an indisputable fact. The eye rolls a father receives from his family, as a result, are clear signs of love and admiration, wishing they themselves could one day harness such a razor-sharp wit.

Recently, u/wolfjawed posted a question on Reddit asking users to share their fathers’ go-to dad jokes.

“What joke will your dad just NOT let go of?”

Aka, the gold standard… aka, the creme de la creme… aka, the “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” joke. The responses varied—both in quality and delivery—but most importantly, they were 100% dad.

Here are some of our favorites:

Hearty pats on the back to all of these goofball dads who know a good joke when they see one!

And feel free to jot some of these down for yourself. Your family can thank us later.

Father Figures: Fragile and Small

“After getting married to my second wife in October of 2017, we decided to try to start a family (neither of us had children yet). Right before Christmas, we found out that my wife was expecting!

Her pregnancy was not an easy one. Multiple trips to the doctors with many different scenarios of what we may expect when our child was born. Very scary few months for both of us.

Flash forward to June 9th, 2018 when my wife wasn’t feeling well and thought she was having heartburn. We went to our local hospital just for precaution. Three hours later, she was in an ambulance to the city (2.5 hrs away); she and the baby were in distress. Minutes after arriving at the hospital, 11 weeks before his due date, our son Brody was delivered via emergency c-section.

He weighed 2 lbs and 1.5 oz. I’ve never seen something so fragile and small in my life.

A week later, on my wife’s 32nd birthday, she was able to hold him for the first time. The first day I got to hold him? Father’s Day! After many ups and downs over the next few months (193 days total), we were able to finally bring our son home, two days before Christmas 2018.

Our little guy is still small for his age and is currently still on oxygen support but has turned into quite the little character and progressing very well.

No matter how bad of a day I have or the mood I’m in when I get home, his smiling little face changes everything for the better.”

– Scott Mason

Want to share a story about fatherhood? Email fatherfigures@thedad.com

The 10 Best Comments of the Week 3/24

Best Comments of the Week

Every week we pan for comedy gold in the comments section of our Facebook posts. If your comment cracks us up (or warms our hearts) we’ll showcase it here!

Here’s this week’s roundup of the 10 Best Comments of the Week:

1. Shrek-Bod

2. Sniper

3. Un-invitational 

4. Dadstracted

5. Pet Peeve

6. If At First You Don’t Succeed

7. So Wont The Real Dad Please Stand Up

8. Therapeutic 

9. To Infinity…and BEYOND

10. Turns Hearing-Aid Off

Check out the previous edition of The Best Comments of the Week here.

Amazing High School Kids Put On “Alien” For School Play

High School Alien
(North Bergen High School)

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

I had to sleep my way through every vanilla-ass 1940s musical like Meet Me In Saint Louis that you can think of, but dads in New Jersey get to go see their kids do freaking Alien?! Yes, that’s right, the Ridley Scott, H.R. Giger 1979 nightmare factory Alien. As a school play. Unbelievable.

The show looks to be filled with homemade costumes and special effects that showcase even the movie’s most gruesome (and awesome) moments, like Kane getting face-huggered, and then later…well, we all know what happens to Kane. Drama club teacher Perfecto Cuervo and Art teacher Steve Defindini have told NJ.com that the students built all the sets and costumes themselves using recycled materials they found around the school. The titular Xenomorph costume, in particular, is amazing, considering these kids had essentially no budget.


Tickets for this show went for about five bucks a pop. Meanwhile, tickets to the Harry Potter play are like three thousand dollars just to stand in the lobby and try to catch glimpses of the stage when the ushers go in and out. Kids are the coolest. They even put together a sleek little trailer to get the word out, and look, all I’m saying is that this whole thing has EGOT potential.


The show only ran two nights, but already the high school is getting calls to add more performances.  Cuervo said he’s not sure they have the budget to extend the run, but hopefully as more people catch wind, an avenue to send some money their way will open up. Considering they made this on a budget of zero dollars, it’d be great to see what they could do with some crowd sourcing behind them; Could a bunch of high schoolers redo Prometheus to actually be good?

Regardless of what happens, this was an amazing display of ingenuity, creativity and teamwork from the North Bergen High School students and faculty. Simply put, there is not a high five high enough to give these kids.

5 MLB Prospects to Watch This Season Whose Dads Were Pros

Vlad Sr & Jr
(Twitter/VladGuerrero27 Getty/Mike Ehrmann)

The 2019 baseball season is upon us, and like most Yankees fans I’m hoping for one simple thing: for the Red Sox to go 0-162. I’d settle for them going 7-155, but that’s about as much as I can handle when it comes to the Red Sox succeeding. Yes, last year was difficult on me.

My personal seething hatred aside, I’m not the only one who’ll be paying close attention this season. In fact, there are a number of former major leaguers from the ‘70s, ‘80s, ‘90s, and ‘00s whose sons are finally old and talented enough to be knocking on the door of the big leagues themselves. These fathers will no doubt be keeping an eye on their offspring’s success, and you should too. Here are a just a handful of second-generation big leaguers-to-be to stay on the lookout for in 2019.

Vladimir Guerrero Jr.

The undisputed #1 prospect in all of baseball, Vladdy Jr. is—as if it weren’t obvious enough from the name—the son of Hall of Famer Vladimir Guerrero, who played for the Expos, Angels, Rangers, and Orioles throughout his illustrious 16-year career.

Vladdy turned heads with his performance in the Blue Jays minor league system in 2018, batting .381 with 20 home runs in just 95 games. But perhaps his most memorable moment occurred while playing in a spring training game last March at Olympic Stadium in Montreal—the very same stadium where his father rose to prominence in the ’90s. Check out the video below:

Vlad is expected to be called up by Toronto Blue Jays come the end of April, that is assuming they aren’t already eliminated from playoff contention. Yes, that may be mathematically impossible so early in the year, but when you’re in the same division as the Yankees, Red Sox, and Rays it’s more or less a guarantee.

Vlad Sr. recently wished his son a happy birthday via Twitter:


Fernando Tatis Jr.


Taking what you learned from the first player on this list, can you guess who this guy’s dad is? That’s right, Fernando Tatis Jr. is none other than the son of Derek Jeter. Sorry, I misspoke. His dad is actually Fernando Tatis, a former big leaguer who played from 1997 until 2010.

While pops is known for being the only player to hit two grand slams in a single inning, Junior is the #2 prospect in baseball, and is primed to make his debut with the San Diego Padres this season playing shortstop on the same side of the infield as the newly acquired 4-time All-Star Manny Machado.

Everyone is excited to see what Tatis Jr. can bring to the major leagues. That is except for fans of the Chicago White Sox, who traded him back in 2016 for James Shields, a pitcher who led the league in losses last year with 16. If only this were MLB The Show and there were a save point the White Sox could return to, but unfortunately that’s not the case, so expect to see Tatis in San Diego soon. I’m sure he likes the weather better anyway.

Here’s Fernando talking about playing under his dad’s guidance this past winter:

Bo Bichette

The son of Rockies’ great Dante Bichette and brother of former Yankees prospect Dante Bichette Jr., Bo has impressed scouts with a combination of bat speed, raw power, and clean footwork to the point that he’s been ranked the #11 prospect in baseball and #2 in the Blue Jays’ system just behind Vlad Guerrero Jr.

Bo is also known for having much better hair than his father. Example A:

Example B:

Enjoy the hairline while it lasts, Bo. It’s clearly genetic.

Bo has yet to play above the AA level but could very well hit the big time in 2019, solidifying the left side of the Blue Jays infield along with Vladdy Jr. for many years to come.

Cavan Biggio

 

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Braden & Cavan Biggio @dunedinbluejays @bluejays @floridastateleague #cavanbiggio #biggio #bluejays #dunedinbluejays #baseball

A post shared by Brian Giacobbe (@briang0381) on

Holy hell, how many Blue Jays are on this list? The son of Hall of Famer and Astros legend Craig Biggio, Cavan may not be as highly regarded as teammates Vlad and Bo, but still remains a top Toronto prospect.

Here’s Cavan talking about the expectations that come with the last name Biggio, and how he’s crafting his own to break out from the shadow of his more famous father:


Like Bo, Cavan has yet to play above AA, but excelled last year with an .887 OPS and 26 home runs, falling just one RBI short of the century mark. Chances are Cavan may make his major league debut before the end of the season, but until then you’re going to have to head up to Buffalo to see him play for the Jays’ Triple-A affiliate.

Hey, even if you don’t care about seeing Cavan you should still make the trip for some good buffalo wings. On second thought, can we just make this list about the 5 best buffalo wings locations throughout the country? No? Too late? Oh well.

Victor Victor Mesa

 

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Got a picture with @victorvictormesa 😱 Really Cool Guy😎 #marlinsspringtraining #victorvictormesa #mesa #baseball

A post shared by ɹǝʎʍpO uɐʌƎ (@evanoscribble) on

Chances are you may never have heard of Victor Victor Mesa, nor his father Victor Mesa, a Cuban baseball legend who drew comparisons to Rickey Henderson. Not only that, but Victor won the gold medal in baseball at the 1992 Summer Olympics, and his career spanned 19 seasons in the Caribbean.

There are a lot of question marks surrounding Victor Victor, who was signed by the Miami Marlins along with his brother Victor Jr. after defecting from Cuba in May of 2018. While scouts speculate he’s more likely to debut in the bigs in 2020, his defense and speed are already said to be big-league ready.

That combined with the fact that the Marlins are desperate to attract fans to see their struggling franchise, Victor Victor may very well shoot his way up through the system sooner than you can say the word Victor twice.

There’s no doubt these five pops are as proud as can be to see their children follow in their footsteps. Hopefully twenty or so years from now, the aforementioned prospects can pass along some insight to kids of their very own, establishing yet another new generation of baseball stars.

Love baseball? More importantly, love embarrassing your kids? Well then be sure to follow the lead of this dancing dad, who left his daughter red in the face while attending a Cubs game last September.

MLB Dad Plays It Cool When Son on Opposing Team Hits a Home Run + More

Son homers Against MLB Dad
(Twitter/NBCSWhiteSox)

Alek Thomas was in high school a year ago and Wednesday, the Arizona Diamondbacks prospect homered in a spring game against the Chicago White Sox. What makes a mildly cool story even better was that his dad was in the opposing dugout when it happened.

His dad, Allen Thomas, has been the White Sox director of strength and conditioning for nearly two decades. Alex practically grew up at the ballpark, so I can’t imagine what this moment was like for them. I do know, however, that Allen held his poker face far longer than anyone could’ve expected.

I think the highest I’ve jumped in the last two years was when my daughter kicked the game-winning goal in a soccer game between five-year-olds where I was the only one keeping score. There is zero chance I could’ve been that cool in a moment like this.

If that was my kid, the second he crossed home plate I would’ve jumped out of the opposing dugout and run crazily around the infield like one of those impossible-to-catch soccer hecklers. Then I would’ve signaled to the PA announcer to play my pre-scheduled music cue, at which point I would dramatically tear off my White Sox jersey, revealing my son’s Arizona jersey beneath, like a pro wrestler making a full heel turn.

Spring training might just be take your kid to work month for Major Leauge Baseball, as the Cincinnati Reds first base coach Delino DeShields got to exchange lineup cards with Texas Rangers center fielder….Delino DeShields. In case you were wondering when Texas plays Cincinnati during the regular season, come on, you already know it’s Father’s Day weekend.

The other sports video that took the internet by storm this past week was a youth basketball game. If you’re curious why so many people have been spreading it around, I’m pretty sure it’s because it is a classic example of how bad sports officiating has become. It’s pretty clear that #50 travels like four times RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE REF! How does he not even see that???? The fix was in, I’m tellin ya.

March Madness is just heating up but we already have one-star performance, after Ja Morant put on a clinic when No. 12 Murray State blew out No. 5 Marquette. Zion Williamson has made his mark as one of the most impressive prospects in more than a decade, but Morant may have done enough to get himself to second. If you ask his dad, he thinks he should go even higher than one, which is exactly how I would act after my kid put up a performance like that. Honestly, it’s not even fair to put a microphone in front of a parent’s face after that, of course, they are going to say something nutty.

In sports dad revenge news, Richard Pitino coached No. 10 Minnesota in a big win over No. 7 Louisville, the school that fired his dad, Rick. At least, that’s the narrative that was being pushed by a small part of basketball media. Rick did, after all, get Louisville entangled in one of the biggest bribery scandals to hit college sports in years. So, I don’t know that I’m quite on board for the revenge story when his dad was a disgraced coach who led his program to more FBI investigations than championships (granted, how you view his legacy depends on how much you value things like vacated final fours and sex scandals).

No matter how you spin it, it doesn’t pack quite the emotional punch of a major leaguer still trying to get his dad’s attention after hitting a home run.

Dad Shaves Toddler’s Head With Photoshop to Prank Wife

(Bobby Wesson)

Bobby Deacon, a writer from Birmingham, Alabama, knew his wife was feeling anxious about their first family photo shoot with their 3-year-old son, so he decided a little prank might lighten her spirits.

Rayena, his wife, works as a trauma nurse, so Bobby and Deacon get to have a lot of ‘guys nights’ during the week. Given the intensity of Rayena’s job, she rarely has time to respond to a bunch of text messages, so when a calmer than usual night finally arrived, Bobby struck.

(Bobby Wesson)

Putting his photoshop skills to use, Bobby doctored a photo of their son to make it look like he had buzzed off a giant patch of his hair.

“She went 0-100 quicker than Drake lyrics,” Bobby told GoodHousekeeping.com. “I knew she would.”

And he wasn’t even close to being done.

(Bobby Wesson)

(Bobby Wesson)

Yes, along with a devious looking photo to remind his wife of his own glorious locks, Bobby claimed to be willing to shave his own head, all in hopes of consoling their own son of course.

Because what father wouldn’t do such a thing for their kid, right?

(Bobby Wesson)
(Bobby Wesson)

Bobby finally decided to call it a day when it looked like “she was going to leave the hospital to put me in one,” as he put it.

(Bobby Wesson)

When she got home, they both (allegedly) had a good laugh about it, claiming that pranks are a standard in the Wesson household.

“We play jokes on each other all the time,” Bobby said. “I ended up with her name tattooed on my butt thanks to a bet lost last year.”

Bobby put the text exchange on social media and it, understandably, went viral almost immediately.

It’s not the first time the couple has achieved internet fame, though. Back in 2015, Bobby put his writing chops to use and penned a beautiful and sincere note about his wife and her amazing roles as both mother and nurse. It has over 920k likes and over 200k shares.

From these posts, it appears there’s rarely a dull moment in the Wesson home, but we doubt they’d prefer it any other way.

Teacher’s Test Has Unique Extra Credit Questions and a Savage Prank

Teacher's Extra Credit Questions
(Imgur/SharkyTheSharkDog)

An extra credit question is like finding a life-preserver in the middle of ocean. It won’t radically change your outlook, but might just be the one thing that saves your life.

And while most teachers tend to tack on an extra difficult or vague question at the end of an exam, one special scholar has thrown the extra credit rulebook out the window.

Imgur user SharkyTheSharkDog has been taking photos of the extra credit questions from this specific teacher and most of them are outrageously fun… with the most recent being a truly special kind of social torture.

1. How many seasons was “Full House” on the air?

 


2. Complete the verse… “I been in the game for ten years makin’ rap tunes…”

 


3. What color pants does Jake from State Farm wear?

 


4. “Yesterday, during my lecture, I quickly mentioned that only a pink pen will save you tomorrow. Draw a stick figure below in that pink pen.”

(brutal…)

 

5. Describe the dumbest conversation you overheard recently.

(extra extra credit!)

 


6. Including “The Revenant,” how many times has Leo DiCaprio been nominated for an Academy Award?

 

7. (And, finally, a savage test of one’s patience and reading comprehension skills…)

First person to read this, stand up proudly on your chair, and yell at the top of your lungs, “Oh Captain, My Captain!” will receive a 95% on this exam.

*Just kidding. Name the drummer for The Beatles.

(Imgur/SharkyTheSharkDog)

We proudly reward this fine teacher with an additional 10 points for their hilarious cruelty. Huzzah!