I spend my days waiting for my next meal and I don't know when that changed

"5 more minutes!"

What, are we paying for ghosts to be able see?

'Tis the season

At this point it feels intentional

You know what you did.

Yes, I have the ability to tell you. No, I'm not going to.

Have you tried screaming?

Great so I'll just clear my next week or so, thanks

I live in constant fear that someone will notice I only know three people's names and one of them is mine

The time spent talking to friends and family is so short mainly because I start talking about the weather

If it works, it works.