Ally Probst or something you find in dirty diaper. We aren't sure.

Ally Probst

Ally Probst is a writer, artist and internet junkie who is addicted to memes. She lives in Des Moines with her husband, two sons, and dog named Indiana Jones.

Scientists Baffled By Toddler Who Woke At 4am, Refused Nap, “Seems to be growing more powerful”

(Getty/puhhha)

A 2-year-old in Cincinnati is defying everything we thought we knew about the science of sleep.

Despite waking for the day at 4am, she refused her afternoon nap and is now too wired to fall asleep at bedtime. Defying all laws of science, logic, God, and man, the child continues to refuse sleep. She has also been making noise nonstop for a record-breaking 16 hours.

“It doesn’t make any sense,” says leading sleep scientist Meredith Rischmann. “With the extremely early wake time and no nap, she should be MORE tired than usual, but it seems like she’s only getting more powerful. She’s in perpetual motion, working indefinitely without an energy source, and we can’t explain it.”

“I can barely keep my eyes open,” states her dad, “We’re getting desperate. There seems to be no end in sight.”

Scientists are unable to explain how the child has not passed out and refuses to settle down, despite being read 3 bedtime stories and given a drink of water. People from the community are rallying around the family, with one neighbor suggesting lavender essential oils, to little avail.

“We tried putting a drop of lavender oil on her pillow, and it’s almost like the nice smell had no effect on her at all!” says her dad.

In a shocking exclusive interview, the toddler in question was asked when she planned to sleep and she screamed, “NEVER!” The child then began levitating and glowing with blinding white heat in a state of pure, uncontrolled energy.

Her exhausted mother was unable to comment, as she had fallen asleep on the couch despite the extremely loud conditions.

This Just In…is The Dad Faking News. Despite being completely plausible to parents, it’s satire and intended for entertainment purposes only. For more stories like this one click here.

Dad of the Month, February 2019: Cameron Ming

(Cameron Ming)

We are proud to announce The Dad of the Month for February 2019: Cameron Ming. Cameron is a dad of five (!) kids. He has dealt with unthinkable tragedy. This month is an especially heavy one for him.

Check out his story in his friend’s nomination:

“Cameron is a proud dad of five children. I’ve known Cameron for years and have always admired the values, independence, and self confidence that he and his wife, Kressyda, instilled in their kids.

Two years ago this month, Kressyda tragically lost her life in a skiing accident. In the space of an afternoon he became their only anchor, at a time when he was struggling to stay afloat himself. Over the past two years, Cameron has heroically dealt with unimaginable grief, all while steering his five children through the storm of losing their mother.

(Cameron Ming)

But grief is the furthest thing from their minds when you ask his kids about their dad. Here’s what they had to say about him:

Eliot, 12: I love to play and watch sports with my dad. I love when he reads us new books. He makes us try weird food like Bolivian eggs, but they were actually really good.

Olive, 10: Something amazing about my dad is that he has 5 KIDS! I love when he puts on shows with stuffed animals and does different voices. And when he takes us skiing and hiking.

Bodhi, 8: My dad is super, duper, duper funny. That man knows how to be silly. He plays with us and makes us laugh and laugh. He made me try ice skating. He’s just the best dad ever.

Petra, 7: He really makes us laugh. He makes us try new books and movies. He’s bright and unique and really great at drawing- he taught me to draw. A few more things: he can fall asleep during a funny movie—what!? He’s nice and cool.

Poppy, 3: I love him because I love horses and him. I love when he snuggles me. He’s good at that. I love sledding and skiing and reading with Daddy. He’s the best Dad because he IS my family.

He has taught them to laugh and love and pray and crave adventure and smile again—all the things that are the very soul of Kressyda. Cameron doesn’t try to fill her shoes; rather, he tries his best to show his kid her example, allowing her to continue to fill them. Perhaps the greatest gift a father could give in that situation.”

(Cameron Ming)

Thank you for letting us share your story, Cameron. Our thoughts are with you and The Dad community celebrates your strength and amazing dadding.

Click here to read more or nominate a special dad in your life.

The Dad of the Month, January 2019: Sam Monin

(Sam Monin)

We are excited to announce The Dad of the Month for January 2019: Sam Monin!

Sam is a real dad who is doing the best he can for his family, no matter what. He faced hard times and continues to face them with positivity and strength. Check out his story in his wife’s nomination:

“I would like to nominate my husband, Sam Monin, as dad of the month. We have had a pretty difficult last year and he has never stopped being an amazing father to our 1-year-old son. He works hard supporting us so that I can stay home with our son, who he is so proud of.

Sam was diagnosed in September with a 4cm brain tumor called craniophyrangioma, after having severe headaches for a year and losing some of his vision. He had to have emergency surgery the day after he got the MRI. The hardest part for him during recovery was not being able to pick up our son. He only took a week off of work, and still managed to be the one providing comfort and reassurance to his family.

We found out I was pregnant 6 weeks after his surgery, to our surprise and joy. He was so excited and didn’t worry for one minute about the medical bills we already owed, or that he may have a lot on his plate.

Then, in December I had a bad bleed and found out I had a very large hemorrhage. We were told in the hospital that I had a 99% chance of having a miscarriage, and the only thing that may help is bed rest. So just when Sam finally had the okay to pick up our son again, I couldn’t lift anything heavier than 5 lbs. He should still be focused on his own recovery, and now he is taking over all the household chores, doing pretty much everything for our son, and working a very demanding job, all while remaining grateful for everything we have been blessed with.

We are hoping for a good outcome, but I know everything will be okay either way because we have such a strong man in our life. He is so loving and patient (and pretty goofy sometimes), and I couldn’t think of a better Dad for our son.”

We can tell how much this dad loves his family and shows up for them every day, through good times and bad. Along with earning the coveted DAD OF THE MONTH title, we’ll be sending Sam $500 and The Dad gear, including a very special, not-for-sale The Dad of the Month shirt! (Wear it with pride, Sam.)

Click here to read more or nominate a special dad in your life.

(Sam Monin)

Dad Spends Christmas Flying Around The Country Just To Be With His Flight Attendant Daughter

(facebook)

We’re calling it: this Dad won Christmas 2018.

When his daughter Vaughan was scheduled to work as a flight attendant on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, Hal was determined to spend the holidays with her. She’d never had a Christmas without her parents and he wasn’t about to let that change this year.

Fellow passenger Mike Levy was amazed by the story, and shared it in a post on Facebook.

(Mike Levy)

It was the first time Hal flew on one of his daughter’s flight because a few months after she started working as a flight attendant, he broke his neck. Doctors said he might never walk again. But after months of physical therapy, Hal was mobile and strong enough to be able to travel with his daughter.

“I’d just never been without my parents on Christmas, so my mom took one for the team and stayed home with all of the pets so he could take his first trip since the accident with me,” Vaughan said in an interview.

Look, up in the sky! It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s SuperDad. If anyone earned the title, it’s this guy.

7 Christmas Movies That Border On Horror Films

The holidays are the perfect time to curl up on the couch by the fire with some hot cocoa and turn on a beloved family Christmas film that will…give your kids nightmares? Why are so many holiday films so downright creepy? Here are 7 of the movies most likely to haunt your psyche forever.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

Jim Carrey Christmas GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

I can’t even decide what my least favorite moment of this movie is, because they are so many, and the whole thing makes me feel extremely unsettled. The tone of it is not magical, but bizarre. The dark new backstory about his childhood bullying is rough but the real nightmare fuel of this movie is in Jim Carey’s mannerisms. He seems genuinely mentally unstable. Most haunting portrayal of a villain besides Heath Ledger’s Joker.

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A Christmas Story (1983) 

Santa Claus Christmas GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

This movie is great but let’s not pretend the scene with the department store Santa is anything other than traumatic. If your kid wasn’t already afraid of Santa, he’s gonna be.

Santa Claus GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

The Polar Express (2004)

The Polar Express Christmas Movies GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

This is one of the best books turned into one of the worst movies. The animated Tom Hanks alone is enough to give you the heebie jeebies. I could go into everything I hate about this movie in depth but I’ll just leave you with the demonic marionette scene. I challenge anyone to watch this and and not feel as if they’ve just been thrust into a CGI hellscape.

A Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)

The Dickens novel is a literal ghost story, so you know it has spooky potential but you see the word “Muppet” and think that will soften it. It does, quite a bit, but I watched this with my kids recently and was struck by how creepy the first floating doll ghost is.

I also had to answer questions from my kids like, “When I die will I be trapped in a giant chain” and “why doesn’t that huge ghost have a head.” It’s simple kids: be good or you will die alone and be sent to hell to suffer eternally. Merry Christmas.

The Muppet Christmas Carol GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

Scrooged (1988)

Sure it’s a Christmas movie and yes it’s Bill Murray but try telling that to your kid’s nightmares (or your own).

Sunglasses Christmas Movies GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

If there was a haunted house based on this movie, I would be too afraid to go. Someone should tell these guys that just because there’s a candy cane in a particular scene doesn’t mean it’s Christmasy. Okay?

Home Alone (1990)

Hey kids, gather round to watch a child left alone for days and forced to defend himself from violent criminals! What a normal, festive premise for a holiday film.

Home Alone Christmas Movies GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

Ironically though, even with the dark storyline of this entire movie, the part that scared me the most as a kid was the furnace in the basement. Never mind the burglars threatening to kill a child, that creepy furnace was bone-chilling.

The Santa Clause (1994)

Okay let’s see here, Santa is DEAD and everyone is pretty chill about it. We get right into “just put on his coat and steal his identity.” They find him laying DEAD on the ground but Disney skirts around the whole “corpse in a kid’s movie” issue by having him disappear immediately and leave his clothes laying flat, as if that is LESS CREEPY?

The Santa Clause Christmas Movies GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

And don’t even get me started on the creepiness factor of those old animated films. (Rudolph, Santa Clause is Coming To Town, Frosty The Snowman.) Those scared me as a child and scare me even more as an adult.

I know I’ve missed some, so feel free to comment with your nomination for creepiest holiday movie scene. Scary Christmas to all, and to all a good fright!

Artist Dad Does Incredible Drawings of His Sons’ Art

(thomasintokyo)

Thomas Romain is an artist who lives in Tokyo, and collaborates with his sons on some super cool artwork. He takes his kids’ drawings and does his own incredible versions of their visions with amazing results. Pretty sure he is up for the title of World’s Coolest Dad.

Check him out on Instagram here.

Funny Dad: Snow Day Edition

(reddit)

Maybe this dad was just trying to entertain himself, or maybe he was driven to insanity by the never-ending winter we are facing. Either way, these are some good quality dad shenanigans right here, and I’m so glad they were documented to share with the world.

My friend’s dad after a snow day from funny

He probably told his wife later, “See honey, I told you that sword would come in handy!” Props to you, Dad. You have made art.

Busted: Dog Phone Thief

(twitter)

This video of a dog stealing its owner’s phone is almost exactly what it feels like to Facetime with my kids. Seriously, I had flashbacks.

 

The Worst 20 Seconds In The History of Sports

(imugr)

Got 20 seconds? Want to scream internally? This video should do it. It’s pretty painful and actually not that different from watching my kid try to play soccer.

Super Weird Mark Hamill Video From the 80s Surfaces

(Twitter)

This video of Mark Hamill from the 80s is the most bizarre thing you’ll see today.

I think I will show this to my kids and let this be a lesson to them. The internet never lets anything go. Be careful out there, folks. Don’t put on the gold jumpsuit.

Security Guard Shuts Down Mascot

(imager)

This dancing mascot made the mistake of getting too close to this security guard. He really had no idea what he was in for.

View post on imgur.com