Everyone worries about their first date and how well the conversation will flow, but not many people stop to think about keeping that conversation going when you’re five, ten, or fifty years into a relationship or marriage. The truth is, though, that chatting up your spouse doesn’t always get easier as time goes by. “Remember that time I-” is met with, “Yeah, Babe. I was there.” Very quickly your conversations become more like to-do lists or quick decision making than actual time spent bonding. “But, we’re married. How much more bonded can we be?” My dude. There is always room for improvement. Trust.
If you’ve got the “We never talk anymore” comment recently, we’re here to help. Figuring out what to talk about when you’re up each other’s asses can be hard. (Uh, especially if you’re living through a pandemic and suddenly both working from home. Let alone when you add kids into the mix.) Luckily, these questions to ask your spouse will help you start new conversations. They’ll also show your partner that you’re trying and you care. *hint hint*
Questions For Your Spouse About Your Kids
1. What physical or emotional trait of yours do you hope our kids inherit? What do you hope they get from me?
2. Would you change anything about when we had kids or how we had kids?
3. What do you wish we were better at as parents?
4. What do you think I’m really good at as a parent? (Note: You need to compliment your co-parent in return!)
5. Is there anything special about your childhood that you’d like to recreate for our kids?
Questions For Your Spouse About Their Hopes and Dreams
6. What’s the last dream you had? The last nightmare?
7. Was there anything you dreamed of doing as a kid that you still wish you could do?
8. How can I help you achieve your goals?
9. What do you think about when you think about a day when we have more free time?
10. What do you wish we could do together as a couple? As a family? What about on your own?
Questions For Your Spouse About Their Day
11. What made your day good/bad today?
12. How did I contribute to your day being good or bad?
13. What made you laugh today?
14. Is there anything you want to accomplish before we go to bed tonight?
15. What can we do together tomorrow that will make you feel appreciated and loved?
Questions For Your Spouse About Their Memories
16. What was your favorite date of ours?
17. If you could relive a time in your life, when would you choose?
18. What about if you could relive a time just in our relationship?
19. What’s your favorite memory with your siblings/parents/grandparents?
20. What memories do you still want to create?
Questions For Your Spouse To Spark Random Conversations
21. Would you ever want a boat? What kind? What would we name it?
22. What kind of pet would you like to have next (or also)? Why?
23. Where would you go on vacation if we could afford to go anywhere?
24. What is something about yourself that you wish more people complimented you for?
25. What non-super superpower would you most like to have? (Think: Learning languages faster/better or being more influential.)