Jessica Ellis is a filmmaker and writer who had probably buried this embarrassing story deep in the recesses of her mind, only to have it painfully drudged up with the news that AIM was being discontinued.

Champion that she is, Jessica decided to share her mortification with the rest of the internet, because what’s the internet for if not schadenfreude and also screaming at strangers for disagreeing with you about who should play Beverly in the IT sequel?

While you read her story, remember, she didn’t have to do this. She didn’t have to make her shame public. But she did, and for that, we love her.

It starts way back in the 90s, when the internet was young…

Let me tell you a story.

About THE WORST AOL instant messenger conversation of my life.

I hyperventilate just thinking about it.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

Background: When I was 15 I had a crazy romance with a boy named Josh. We're talking house sneaking, virginity losing, etc. He moved away.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

So I'm now 18. He's spent the summer in Guam, working for the salvation army. His away message finally vanishes in late August. I'm giddy.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

She’s older now because it’s 2017 and that’s how math works. Unfortunately for her, her long-lost love had made the jump to adulthood a bit more quickly than she had…

What he tells me is that he got a girl PREGNANT in Guam.
(I died)
But they BROKE UP
(alive again)
But he's going to RAISE THE BABY
(dead.)

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

Because she doesnt want to keep it and he wants to raise it in the US
(Dead, eternal)
So he's going to raise it in WA, where he lives?
Well

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

SO, I am like "Josh, you cannot be serious...are you??"
And he tells me I'm the love of his life, he can't imagine doing this without me.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

Here, she pauses to remind us how much she dug this dude. Her little teenage heart was smitten, besotted, dare-I-say obsessed. She was ready for anything.

Except baby Guam.

So I'm like - I need two seconds to think about this. Flip on my away message. Breathe into a paper bag. I'm supposed to start COLLEGE soon.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

Would I really throw it all away to raise someone else's baby with the love of my life?? WOULD I?
Yeah, cause I'm stupid.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

Cool, man, good luck with that. Ima head off to college so I’ll catchya on the flip-flop — wait what?

So I head back to the computer. Kick my dad off. Type in, "I've thought about it, and yes. Yes, I want you so much. Let's do it."

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

Bruh.

BRUH.

Maybe it’s because I’m a dad now, and the thought of one of my kids throwing away their life to raise someone else’s lovechild makes me want to throw up all over myself, but I’ve never been happier to learn this was a cruel joke.

Look, I was 18 once. In fact, I’m 41 now but I’m basically still 18 (don’t tell my kids.) And I remember the early days of online life. They were heady, full of excitement and promise. We could talk to anyone, anywhere, at any time. Catfishing wasn’t a thing – at least, it didn’t yet have a name. It was a more innocent time…

But shit, Jessica. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

And it’s here that things go from romantic and stupid to embarrassing and humiliating. But also THANK GOD.

It turns out that his asshole best friend, who had been anti-me when we dated and was still anti-our friendship, had been over.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

And had signed onto Josh's AIM and used it to convince me to throw away my life and reunite with my lost love while raising his baby.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

She was ready to ditch school for this guy! And despite the fact that the pranker was a twisted individual who deserves congratulations for pulling it off to burn in hell, the fact that it was a practical joke turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to Jessica.

And I honestly don't remember how this story ends, because I blacked out.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

She’d unwittingly dodged the bullet, and the blame obviously lies with the jerk who played her like butter plays toast. But one can’t help but think Jessica is none too sad that AOL’s instant messenger service, the method via which she was humiliated, has finally met its demise.

AIM was a cruel master of fate.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) October 6, 2017

Matt’s father Billy suffers from Alzheimer’s Disease, and the symptoms have been accruing rapidly. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t time for more memories, and Matt used the latest Father’s Day as an opportunity to do just that. The 36-year-old drove 12 hours, from Florida to Mississippi, and surprised his parents at their doorstep on Sunday.

He was bearing gifts as well, bringing his dad the jersey of his favorite baseball team, Mississippi State. But that wasn’t all. Matt brought tickets too, to see the College World Series in Omaha in person.

In video of the exchange that Matt posted on Twitter, his dad was clearly taken by surprise.

Surprised my dad today to tell him I’m taking him to Omaha to watch @HailStateBB play. His Alzheimer’s is setting in fast but I know he’s going to have a blast this weekend. Hail State!!! pic.twitter.com/NTtAxcxxIj

— Matt Lea (@tigr2ndbase) June 14, 2018

“I figured it’s probably not good enough just for us to watch the game here,” Matt says in the video as he produces the tickets. “How about we go to Omaha? Do you want to go up to Omaha and watch the College World Series together?”

“Golly,” an emotional Billy responds. “You’re gonna break my heart, here.”

Matt’s gift for his dad received a rapturous response from Twitter, where it’s been liked 46,000 times and retweeted 11,000 times.

Thanks everyone. I live 12 hours away in Florida now so it took him completely by surprise when I showed up. We can’t wait to get up there. Hate we’ll only be there for opening weekend but it’s going to be a great final trip for us.

— Matt Lea (@tigr2ndbase) June 14, 2018

Matt seemed as surprised by the response as his dad was by the gift, as everyone who celebrated Father’s Day yesterday knows, there’s nothing better than sharing meaningful memories with your dad, which is exactly what Matt did. An article on Omaha.com details Billy’s baseball past, the initial diagnosis of his Alzheimer’s, the VIP experience Matt treated him too over the weekend.

Matt’s Twitter account showcased the rest.

Thanks to everyone that made today something we’ll treasure forever. We have a couple things to do tomorrow before have to head home. @HailStateBB keep grinding and believe. You’re a team of destiny. pic.twitter.com/GamW2sEJ9i

— Matt Lea (@tigr2ndbase) June 17, 2018

Thank you @HailStateBB for everything. You’ve given us an incredible time together. Thank you to all that have offered room/tickets for the rest of the games. Dad needs to get home back into his routine and familiar surroundings. Now go get a championship!!!!! pic.twitter.com/5Y0NNORIoo

— Matt Lea (@tigr2ndbase) June 17, 2018

Happy Father’s Day!

– Mike Kuyper

Want to share a story about fatherhood? Email fatherfigures@thedad.com

Can’t get enough? Check out more creative cosplay on his Facebook page.

You can find more awesome album covers as well as other design projects by Ryan on his Instagram.

2. A streaming stick

“So yeah, you just plug this Roku stick into the TV and you can pretty much watch anything you want.” That’s you. That’s you telling your dad you just spent a boatload of money on a piece of technology. “Instant access to every movie ever made” is your dad’s cue to ask you to retrieve the Best Buy receipt crammed in the console’s cupholder.

3. A dashcam

These are great to have in the event of an accident. Unfortunately, your dad is still under the impression it’s 1999 and all digital cameras cost ten million dollars. Be sure to keep this receipt in your wallet, because this thing’s going right back to the store if it ran you how much he thinks it ran you.

4. An e-reader

What a lovely thought. Your dad, sitting up in bed, every book he could possibly want at his fingertips. What will he read first? A book about World War II? The biography of Henry Ford? The answer is, of course, the receipt for this fancy reading tablet that probably set you back three mortgage payments.

5. A yearly-subscription to a music streaming service

You just want him to be able to listen to the Doobie Brothers whenever he wants. But by his math, if buying a single song on iTunes costs $1, and Spotifly, as he calls it, gives you access to over four million songs, you’ve essentially just bankrupted your family. Good job. Be sure to keep that receipt handy to prove to him that he can still see his grandkids attend college one day.