If you’ve ever gone to your local Target looking for a bathing suit, chances are you’ve wandered through aisle after aisle of women’s swimwear in hundreds of colors and styles before finally stumbling upon the single shelf of swim trunks. It seems to be a theme across all types of fashion – women getting nearly endless choices to showcase their individuality, while men essentially have to choose from five different combinations of shirt and pants. Two friends from Toronto were fed up with the monotony of men’s swimwear, so they decided to do something (very weird) about it. If women get to wear bikinis, then dammit, men should get to wear Brokinis.
In a style reminiscent of Borat but more absurd somehow, the brokini is basically a speedo with a single over-the-shoulder strap connecting the front to the back. Chad Sasko and Taylor Field describe their creation as a “bathing suit revolution of schmedium proportions”. Can’t argue with that, mostly because we wouldn’t know where to start. Though the entire line of brokinis seems like one big spoof on itself, the innovative Canadians, bless their hearts, built a fully-functional website to showcase their product.
Two patterns are for sale for $45 each on the Brokini website, but even if you’re not in the market for a “Bromingo” or “Fineapple” Brokini, the product’s site is well worth a visit. “We (the founders) excelled in high school and found classes to be a joke. We therefore didn’t develop any work or study ethic and spent most of our time playing hacky sack and sword fighting with meter sticks,” the “about” section explains. “We somehow made it into business school and were both perfectly mediocre and that is why we are stuck running a business that loses money like crazy.”
The pages of the Brokini site are filled with the two friends modeling their creation, posing with inflatable water animals, and frolicking about – my God, there is so. Much. Frolicking. In case you need more information about the Brokinis themselves (pretty sure we get it), the product pages provide some handy facts. ”The perfect swimwear to make your parents question where they went wrong,” the site aptly states. “2 out of 2 moms polled said our website is: ‘it looks great honey.’”
Whether or not Brokinis are the next swimsuit craze to hit Holiday Inn pools around the world is yet to be determined, but there is one thing I can say for sure: if you have the confidence to unironically rock a Brokini in public, you’ve already made it.