“Now THIS is Music!” Proclaims Dad Listening to Terrible Music

Incorrectly identifying the song as “a classic,” local dad Gerald Coffey turned heads this week after matter-of-factly stating, “Now THIS is music!” while listening to terrible music.
Family members grew concerned when a seemingly confused Coffey cranked the volume knob on their car radio and announced, “This is my jam,” to a song no one with functioning eardrums would possibly designate as their jam.
“They just don’t make tunes like this anymore,” Coffey mistook, dismissing decades of innovation to hum along with the unmitigated mediocrity of his youth.
“Man, this rocks so hard,” he continued in error while throwing up a shamefully undeserved set of devil horns.
Coffey says he’s looking forward to their next stoplight, hoping he can bust out the air guitar in time for the song’s shitty, uninspired solo.
“Real face-melter coming up,” he overstated.
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