Christmas is just around the corner and The Man in Red is sitting on his throne in every mall across the USA. And what could be more adorable than watching your kids have a magical experience with Santa? Nothing. But what could be FUNNIER than watching your kids have a terrifying encounter with that creepy, bearded, old guy? Also, kind of nothing.

We taught our baby sign language. This is the sign for "help." You're welcome. pic.twitter.com/i6NkxBf4KP

— Kerry Spencer (@Swilua) December 5, 2017

I know we shouldn’t laugh when we are probably facilitating the creation of formative trauma, but honestly whom amongst us can keep a straight face at these miniature humans having such giant emotions? I mean, they’re the ones who jumped up with excitement at the mention of meeting Mr. Claus in the first place, right? They’ve seen the movies. It’s not like they were unaware that the guy resembles that unkempt drunk dude who always hangs outside of the 7-11.

@PaulKonrad @WGNRobin @LarryPotash @WGNMorningNews Here's one for ya! My Friends Santa Fail! pic.twitter.com/7YRhvJ1G5B

— Kellee Widman (@kelleew) December 20, 2015

Have we ever considered that ‘Saint Nick’ sounds like something you’d ironically call that one uncle who has three DUIs?

And while we’re on the topic of criminal activity, you know what else is a misdemeanor? Breaking and entering. I don’t care that he’s bringing gifts, this whole premise is creepy as heck. I would probably panic too if I was forced to mingle with old Kris Kringle.

Here are a few other kids who were (rightfully) scared out of their minds to meet this guy.

Some kids are braver than others…

Poor younger siblings, being dragged to face down a demon in a red suit.

This baby was straight-up horrified and her big brother tried to hold it together but the “WTF” is written all over his face.

“MERRY” Christmas, eh?

This next one almost looks like a half decent encounter, until you look closer at her face. Ah yes, the Santa-induced death stare.

My heart is pounding with the sheer intensity of the fight or flight response triggered in this next baby.

And then there is the classic, dramatic reach for mom. “Why have you betrayed me like this, I trusted you!”

The smartest little escape artists know that the best technique is making your entire body straight and rigid like a board until he starts to lose his grip and you can just slide off.

And finally, this little one didn’t even make it within 50 feet of Santa before collapsing face-first into a pile of fake snow to hide from the world.

Suffice to say, Santa should give all of us the heebie-jeebies. It makes all the sense in the world that kids freak out when forced upon the Jolly Man’s lap. But all things considered, the traumatic trip to the mall is totally worth it for the hilarity that will ensue.

If you have pictures of your own Santa Fails, send them to us! We’d love to laugh along with you.

Benjamin Russo is a pretty special young man. The 9-year-old who lives with his family in Canada recently posted a video sharing a talent that he says all stems from his unique superpower.

No, Benjamin can’t fly, nor can he see through walls or leap tall buildings in a single bound.

Benjamin has Dyslexia, which oftentimes makes things such as reading and understanding languages difficult. However, Benjamin’s mom Melanie Russo says his reading disability also comes with a few other characteristics which her son has turned into a heightened ability to perform otherwise complex tasks

Take for example the well-known Rubik’s cubes. The one-time toy that has now become the gold standard of brainy competitions around the world. Benjamin can finish a single side of the cube in about one second. While that’s not a world record or anything, it’s what he does after he has solved them that has people sharing his story and this incredible video:

It opens with Benjamin sharing his story via printed cards, then embarking on what ended up being a 5-hour session spread over several days to complete a pixel-perfect portrait of Professional Wrestler John Cena made completely out of specially solved cubes. The video ends with Benjamin sharing an important message, “Dyslexia is not my disability, Dyslexia is my SUPERPOWER.”

The video went viral, quickly spreading across the web and eventually to the social media feed of the WWE superstar himself. He then shared the clip with a special message for Benjamin and everyone else:

This is the embodiment of #NeverGiveUp.
Benjamin demonstrates courage, perseverance, vulnerability, tremendous strength… and he’s an ARTIST! I admire you, your work, and your outlook.https://t.co/HtChYVAj32

— John Cena (@JohnCena) December 29, 2019

Benjamin shows no signs of slowing down either, recently posting this full-size homage to fan-favorite Keanu Reeves.

View this post on Instagram

2nd mosiac of John Wick SKIN from @fortnite ! 750 cubes #fortnite #johnwick #keanureeves #cubekid #johnwickskin #dyslexia

A post shared by Benjamin Russo (@benjaminrussocubeart) on Jan 18, 2020 at 3:22pm PST

It’s yet another reminder that a diagnosis of dyslexia or autism is only a small part of an individual’s full story. We’re excited to see what Ben creates next, which he promises to share on his Instagram page found here.

Baby Yoda is having a moment. He’s taken the internet by storm and must be protected at all costs, before being fully exploited. Even the news Baby Yoda was coming to Build-A-Bear was well received and the scale had yet to be tipped.

That is, until yesterday when the head of Disney took things too far, making Baby Yoda officially a corporate SHILL. Robert Iger, Chairman and CEO of the Walt Disney Company, tweeted an image of Baby Yoda decked out in Green Bay Packers colors shortly before the NFC Championship game with a simple “Let’s go @Packers” message.

Don’t ever do this to that sweet baby ever again pic.twitter.com/2pEInEueki

— Patrick McMeen (@Real_Meathead) January 20, 2020

The internet didn’t take it well. While it’s still unconfirmed if this is a picture from Season 2 of “The Mandalorian” (it’s not), many were not happy with the blatant misrepresentation of everyone’s favorite force baby.

🏉🏉🏉🏉 😄🌉 pic.twitter.com/465inByslN

— Bruno Cendón (@BrunoCendon) January 20, 2020

Clearly the Force was very much with the San Francisco 49ers, who thoroughly crushed the Packers and ended their season. Seeing the Baby Yoda magic come up short must make the memes like this sting a little bit more, but this is the risk you take by bringing a beloved icon into the mix.

Strange because last I checked Baby Yoda is part of #ChiefsKingdom pic.twitter.com/93ESKrXtfa

— S H A N E (@shaneasel) January 19, 2020

Thank you @Runzwthscizzors for this #BabyYoda sporting the #49ers and #JimmyGaroppolo jersey this is awesome pic.twitter.com/GCc3ozEYpy

— CaptnSpicyPantsGaming (@SpicyCaptn) January 20, 2020

Honestly, it probably makes more sense for Baby Yoda to be a 49ers fan, given that Lucasfilm’s offices are in San Francisco. Of course, he’s an alien in a fictional universe, so…maybe he doesn’t have any sports allegiances?

And inevitably, some decided to adopt the practice of making Baby Yoda a shill for whatever they wanted.

Hey Bob! Watch #TheConners on #ABC this Tuesday night! It’s a love letter to our epic football rivalry!! pic.twitter.com/uHVclaDxL0

— alicia goranson (@privateego) January 20, 2020

Disney has made several missteps with the Star Wars franchise in the eyes of many fans, and now their CEO has made yet another, keeping Baby Yoda out of the Super Bowl by tying him to the woefully inadequate Packers.

A 5-year-old boy in the U.K. became the first to receive a full prosthetic arm recently after being born prematurely and missing a significant portion of his left arm. And the thing Jacob Scrimshaw most excited to do with his new bionic arm? Finally hug his little brother.

Gb, the Christmas present for Jacob: a bionic arm “like the Hulk. Now he can hug his little brother” https://t.co/TCzYX9sde6 pic.twitter.com/MHXK9M1ktK

— News1 English (@News1English) December 19, 2019

5-year-old boy gets Hulk inspired prosthetic arm, can finally hug his young brother https://t.co/lrv5EMpwHd

— Republic (@republic) December 21, 2019

The parents started looking into the groundbreaking procedure after the boy came home from school crying one day.

“I always thought Jacob coped well without his arm, but when he came home from school in tears I knew we had to do something,” his mom told a British news agency.

They initially had a tough time finding someone who could produce a functional prosthetic arm, as most said it wasn’t a reality when the upper arm was involved. The family eventually found a company that agreed to make it a reality so they crowd-funded to raise the money for it.

The robotic arm is pretty innovative (and not cheap, as it cost more than $20,000) but the boy is most excited because it’s green and modeled after The Hulk. His parents were excited to watch him open Christmas presents with two hands for the first time. And his little brother? Just excited to get a full hug from big bro.

“The picture is of my husband at his graduation this past Monday, for his Bachelors degree. That’s the face of a proud graduate looking back at his wife and children after 5 years of blood, sweat, and tears…

…working two (sometimes three) jobs, raising three (going on four) kids, no babysitters, no grandparents, aunts or uncles to take the kids during midterms or finals, no nest egg for tuition, and giving up a 10-year career for a better future.

We had lots of emotional support and love, but we did all the heavy lifting… and his face shows it!

That’s the face of success!”

– Bettye Erich

Want to share a story about fatherhood? Email [email protected]

Check out the previous editions of Father Figures here.

Every week we pan for comedy gold in the comments section of our Facebook posts. If your comment cracks us up (or warms our hearts) we’ll showcase it here!

Here’s this week’s roundup of the 10 Best Comments of the Week:

1. Crazy Town 

2. Dependants  

3. 10-4 

4. Strip 

5. Yelpped

6. Cereal Killers 

7. Teach a Man 

8. Tip 

9. Devastating  

10. It’s Personal

Check out the previous edition of the best comments of the week here.

HARTFORD, CT – Sprawled out on the couch in agonizing discomfort, local father Gabe White is hoping it’s not too much longer until his son returns home from day camp and can come to his aid, as Gabe is physically unable to fart unless someone pulls his finger.

“I spent so many years conditioning my body to fart on command that I can no longer do it without a very specific stimulus,” said a clearly bloated Gabe, who had no idea that years of pranking his child would backfire so spectacularly.

While Gabe has desperately attempted to squeeze out a fart for the past several hours his efforts have been all for naught, as he’s only managed to strain several ab muscles that he didn’t even know he had as they were hidden under his beer gut.

“I need you to come home from work and pull my finger,” said a desperate Gabe over the phone to his wife, who immediately hung up without a saying a word, thus leaving Gabe utterly despondent and unable to escape this hellish, gassy situation.

Unfortunately for Gabe, little does he know that his son had a playdate scheduled after camp today, which means it’ll be at least several more hours before he can relieve himself. Here’s hoping he gets lucky and the mailman shows up soon and is willing to lend a literal hand.

Despite being completely plausible to parents, THIS JUST IN is satire and intended for entertainment purposes only. For more stories like this one click here.

A woman was leaving the Denver airport when she saw what she thought was a piece of trash on the ground. She decided to pick it up to “put litter in its place” but realized it was a heartfelt note written by a girl to her father. What she thought was trash, was actually treasure – so she decided to try to find Emma’s dad.

“It was just about the sweetest thing I’ve ever read,” the woman, Alex Roberts, told a Denver news outlet. She shared a picture of the note on Twitter and started a campaign to #FindEmmasDad.

Was walking out of @DENAirport and picked up what I thought was trash to throw away. How wrong I was, let’s #FindEmmasDad ! pic.twitter.com/46PM6Z65JL

— Alexandria Roberts (@NevadaRoamer) January 9, 2020

The note read:

Dear, Daddy
In all the things I do, I want to do them just like you. Although right now sort of small. Like you I want to be brave and smart, cause I love you, Daddy, with all my heart. When I am older I’ll be so glad if I grow up to be just like you.
Love, Emma

Ok, she is right, that is one of the sweetest things I’ve ever read. Roberts said she wants to find the dad so he can keep the deeply heartfelt letter, something she said she would treasure if it came from her kid. Still, she knows it’s a long shot to #FindEmmasDad.

“I mean what are the chances we find this person? But how cool would it be if we actually did?” she told a Denver News Channel. She surmised the dad is a big part of young Emma’s life.

“I feel like he’s a role model. He’s a very active person in her life and having a lot to do with how she perceives the world,” she said. “And I think that’s the kind of parent most people want to be and it sounds like this guy is succeeding.”

Yes, it is a longshot. But the Denver news stations seem to be signal-boosting the call, and the internet has banded together to solve far more hopeless situations. So, if you know the Dad of an Emma who either lives in Denver or has been in the airport recently (OK, this really may be a pretty big longshot), tell him to come get his letter!