I know we shouldn’t laugh when we are probably facilitating the creation of formative trauma, but honestly whom amongst us can keep a straight face at these miniature humans having such giant emotions? I mean, they’re the ones who jumped up with excitement at the mention of meeting Mr. Claus in the first place, right? They’ve seen the movies. It’s not like they were unaware that the guy resembles that unkempt drunk dude who always hangs outside of the 7-11.

@PaulKonrad @WGNRobin @LarryPotash @WGNMorningNews Here's one for ya! My Friends Santa Fail! pic.twitter.com/7YRhvJ1G5B

— Kellee Widman (@kelleew) December 20, 2015

Have we ever considered that ‘Saint Nick’ sounds like something you’d ironically call that one uncle who has three DUIs?

And while we’re on the topic of criminal activity, you know what else is a misdemeanor? Breaking and entering. I don’t care that he’s bringing gifts, this whole premise is creepy as heck. I would probably panic too if I was forced to mingle with old Kris Kringle.

Here are a few other kids who were (rightfully) scared out of their minds to meet this guy.

Some kids are braver than others…

Poor younger siblings, being dragged to face down a demon in a red suit.

This baby was straight-up horrified and her big brother tried to hold it together but the “WTF” is written all over his face.

“MERRY” Christmas, eh?

This next one almost looks like a half decent encounter, until you look closer at her face. Ah yes, the Santa-induced death stare.

My heart is pounding with the sheer intensity of the fight or flight response triggered in this next baby.

And then there is the classic, dramatic reach for mom. “Why have you betrayed me like this, I trusted you!”

The smartest little escape artists know that the best technique is making your entire body straight and rigid like a board until he starts to lose his grip and you can just slide off.

And finally, this little one didn’t even make it within 50 feet of Santa before collapsing face-first into a pile of fake snow to hide from the world.

Suffice to say, Santa should give all of us the heebie-jeebies. It makes all the sense in the world that kids freak out when forced upon the Jolly Man’s lap. But all things considered, the traumatic trip to the mall is totally worth it for the hilarity that will ensue.

If you have pictures of your own Santa Fails, send them to us! We’d love to laugh along with you.

But that’s the great thing about beer, nay… America. We all have individual tastes. Just because some guy doesn’t share your affinity for a specific brew, that doesn’t mean he’s wrong (even though he is!) It just means you get to connect with someone with a differing perspective, while drinking beer!

So, if you see Jim in a bar, don’t make fun of him for his taste in beer. Instead, buy him a round, and make fun of his age – like an adult.

Cheers, Jim!

He takes a much calmer, more sympathetic approach to parenting than Lois. She has a short fuse, at the end of which is a barrel of dynamite eager to ground someone for the rest of their life. Hal, conversely, seizes any opportunity to bond with his boys by having a sit-down and doling out fatherly words of wisdom.

He’s far more lenient, but will raise his voice and put his foot down when necessary. He’s often creative in his punishments. For example, when Malcolm told him “[bleep] you,” Hal sat him down in the backyard and forced him to look him in the eyes and read aloud a comprehensive list of every vile swear words, teaching him their power.

His biggest strength, however, is his laid-back, often immature attitude. It serves as a refreshing palate cleanser for Lois’ incessant shouting. He is truly the yin to her yang.

DAD WEAKNESSES

He’s more permissive than his wife. In one episode, Hal surprises the boys by letting them skip school to accompany him at some stock car races.

Hal’s lax approach to parenting is, regrettably, his biggest weakness. His spontaneity and often childish behavior sets a bad example for his sons. Case in point: the steamroller. After winning some money on a scratch-off, Hal secretly rents a steamroller.

When Dewey catches him, Hal agrees to let him steamroll over Reese’s bike. Ultimately, Hal goes mad with power and Dewey must talk him down from steamrolling a row of cars. Surely this gave Dewey license to misbehave in the future. His impulsive nature is typically harmless, but still sets precedent for the delinquency of his kids.

VERDICT

Despite shortcomings at the cost of his need to be the parent his sons actually like, Hal is a great father. Sure, all four of his sons are rambunctious hellions, disobedient and destructive at every turn, but that’s predominantly the result of their stubborn, temperamental mother. He’s a big-hearted working stiff, determined to provide for his family however dysfunctional they may be.

FINAL DAD GRADE: A-

It’s been a long journey and no two days are alike. Through it all we’ve learned that Faye is just a younger, female version of her older brother. From her diagnosis, we were able to recognize the ASD traits in Jordan. He is now beginning the diagnostic process.

But long story short, both our girls now attend an autism unit in a special school. It’s a God send and they are both doing great! They turned 6 in August and Jordan will be 11 this December.

Be positive and always make sure your child gets all they need. Raising a child with special needs definitely puts into perspective what’s important in life!

Everything for the kids!”

– Nic Young

Want to share a story about fatherhood? Email fatherfigures@thedad.com

Aside from a small modification to the bike’s seat, he’ll be riding the bike as-is. “My knees clear the handlebars by about half an inch so it’s going to be really tight, but it’s a great bike,” he told the BBC. When he factors in his unique mode of transportation Peter estimates the ride from Bristol to Land’s End will take him a week to complete.

Ellie loved cycling and impressed her dad at age three, when she was able to ride without training wheels.

The bike he’ll be riding was her pride and joy – a present she received for her last Christmas.

So far Peter has raised £23,349 (roughly $30K US) through his JustGiving campaign, already doubling his £10,000 target.

What a guy! What a dad! Go, Peter, go!

If you’d like donate to Peter’s campaign, visit his JustGiving page.

If you want to learn more about where the money is going, check out The Brain Tumour Charity.