Citing an inability to see the television due to his child’s nontransparent body, local dad Keith Allen reported this week that his six-year-old son, Thomas, makes a much better door than window.
“I was trying to watch football,” Keith recalled. “Suddenly this kid gets the idea, despite being a solid mass of bone and cartridge through which light cannot pass, to just stand in right in front of the TV.”
Keith told us that the game was neck-and-neck in its fourth quarter, and also that, of the ten thousand baby names he and his wife considered, he doesn’t remember Casper being one of them.
“I was half-tempted to go and get his birth certificate,” Keith continued. “Just to ask him to show me where it says his mom and I opted for a baby made out of glass.”
Luckily, he was able to finish the game in full view after convincing his son to go outside and play. After getting up to close to the ajar front door, Keith proceeded to inspect the house to make sure it was not, in fact, a barn.