Today is bittersweet. I’ve avoided the Baby Shark phenomenon for years. Even while writing about the stuffed animals and the Billboard charts and the DJ set at Coachella, I’ve somehow managed to mostly skirt the song. I’ve never heard the whole thing, and my kids are totally unaware of it.

And then it infiltrated baseball.

Last night, at Nationals Park in Washington, DC, there was a Baby Shark attack.

Nationals player Gerardo Parra decided to make the insipid earworm his at-bat music, apparently following in Texas Ranger Elvis Andrus’s footsteps. The good news for Nationals fans is that it’s been working! In the 19 games since Parra changed his music, he’s batted .357.

So perhaps it makes sense that last night, when Parra came up to bat, the crowd was here for it, totally vibing out to the Baby Shark bop, and terrifying every fan in the park that doesn’t have a child.

Check it out.

Something about the song is working. Once he got up to the plate, with the Nationals already up 5-0 and both his teammates and the crowd enthusiastically making shark hands to accompany the song, Parra clearly smelled blood in the water. He hit a two-run single, adding to the Nationals lead on the way to a blowout 11-1 win.

Even the announcers were into it, with one of them laughing and happily exclaiming:

“The whole park’s doing it, look around, this is crazy! That was better than I thought it was gonna be and I thought it was gonna be great!”

It was pretty great, despite the fact that I can now cross “never heard Baby Shark” off my accomplishments list. Et Tu, baseball?

The Sopranos was one of the greatest TV shows of all time. The darkly funny drama ushered in the age of the anti-hero, as Tony Soprano paved the way for morally dubious dads like Walter White and Marty Byrde. While fans eagerly await the prequel the series continues to be remembered for its infamously cryptic finale, which was hotly debated by fans for years. Until now. The creator of the series accidentally let it slip what really happened to Tony in the final scene.

In the series finale, which aired in 2007, Tony and his family are eating at a diner while Don’t Stop Believing is playing. The tension builds throughout the scene, as the mob boss in the middle of a mafia turf war keeps scanning the room for threats, until…everything goes black.

Was he whacked? Was it the guy in the Members Only jacket at the bar?? It had to be, right? Or is the fade to black symbolism for what the rest of Tony’s life is going to be like, where he can’t even enjoy a family dinner without being on high alert for danger??? Maybe it’s all a metaphor for something esoteric and pointless (every 10th person has some wild theory like this, and they are obviously trying to stand out by being dumb).

We have an answer now, as Sopranos creator David Chase was doing an interview for a book commemorating the series when he let it slip during an answer to a question the author, TV critic Alan Sepinwall, asked.

Sepinwall: “When you said there was an end point, you don’t mean Tony at Holsten’s [the diner], you just meant, ‘I think I have two more years’ worth of stories left in me.’ ”

Chase: “Yes, I think I had that death scene around two years before the end … But we didn’t do that.”

Spoiler Alert: Tony Soprano died.

Anyone who argued otherwise was, is, and always will be wrong.https://t.co/49x6jLc9oD

— JERRY DUNLEAVY (@JerryDunleavy) June 11, 2020

The author called him out for acknowledging it was a death scene and noticing his mistake, Chase cursed out the authors. So, we finally officially know what we always suspected we knew…Tony Soprano, New Jersey mob boss, was whacked.

The prequel movie, “The Many Saints of Newark”, is scheduled for a 2021 release.

And, with respect to one of the most compelling TV dads, and to what a great actor James Gandolfini was, here are his most bad-ass moments on the series.

There’s a reason people keep wondering if Back to the Future is ever going to be rebooted (it’s not): it’s a classic. People love it, and they’re scared Hollywood is going to mess with it. There are so many indelible parts of the movie, including catchphrases, outfits, props, and soundtrack.

Michael J. Fox, the one and only McFly, knows how important the movie’s legacy is, and he’s leveraging it for a good cause.

Doner Designs has created a bass guitar inspired by the Back to the Future DeLorean, and, built to look like the dashboard, complete with a flux capacitor, this thing is a sight for sore eyes.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Doner Designs (@donerdesigns) on Jun 17, 2020 at 7:53pm PDT

Here’s the official description of the guitar, which was auctioned off, with all proceeds going to the Michael J. Fox Foundation:

This one-of-a-kind custom creation results from a ~300-hour labor of love by Steve and Richard Doner …Direct reference to the Back to the Future movie series was avoided, out of respect for intellectual property, but the bass features a selectable destination year display, a device resembling a flux capacitor and other electronic gadgetry sure to please fans of the time travel entertainment genre, 80’s pop culture and musicians alike.

Look at the detail!

 

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A post shared by Doner Designs (@donerdesigns) on Jun 2, 2020 at 7:18pm PDT

That’s not all, the flux capacitor – baked right into the body of the guitar – actually lights up. You can see it in the video below. Now if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go back in time to be the one who buys this thing!

Being out in nature is one of the most freeing, exhilarating experiences imaginable. That is unless you have one kid who has to pee, another who’s hungry (he ate 4 granola bars in the car?), and a sunburn so bad you may as well just get new skin. Or, in Cambry’s case, if most paths out in nature are inaccessible because of your wheelchair.

Fortunately for Cambry, she happens to be married to YouTuber Zack Nelson, who calls his channel “Jerry Rig Everything”. This guy is all about technology – he builds things, takes things apart, and tests the durability of different tech products. Very few people have the resources or the ability to do what Zack did when he decided to give his then-girlfriend the gift of a lifetime. He wanted to help Cambry access parts of the world that she had, until this point, only been able to dream of seeing in person.

Zack did exactly what any tech-savvy guy with two spare electric bikes would do – he fused them together and stuck a seat in the middle (I assume there was a lot more to it than that, but that’s the gist). This innovative wheelchair-like contraption allowed Cambry to experience things she had only ever dreamed of experiencing. It operates as an electric wheelchair, but it’s far more capable of handling off-road terrain than nearly any wheelchair on the market. The wheelchair operates so quietly that the sound doesn’t at all detract from the peacefulness of being out in nature.

Now, Cambry and Zack have started selling their off-road “Not-A-Wheelchair” AKA “The Rig” to allow others to experience the same level of freedom. The Not-A-Wheelchair costs $4,750, which is more affordable than any other wheelchair branded for “off-road” terrain. It is also faster, quieter, and can last from 10-20 miles on a single battery.

The Not-A-Wheelchair website explains, “Shopping for an off road wheelchair can be frustrating. There are a few different options out there, but they can cost as much as a car or are super slow. Cambry and I decided to put our heads together, and build our own off road wheelchair. Something that’s quick and light with a super long range. And we finally have it! We’d like to introduce ‘Not-a-Wheelchair’ a fully electric, super quiet, accessible bike that can go 12mph with a range of about 10-20 miles. Our whole goal is to provide something that is capable and affordable. We hope you enjoy! Be safe! Wear a helmet.”

Thanks, Zack and Cambry, we’d love to roll with you any day.

Hollywood may still be largely shut down as the pandemic continues to rage across the country, but that hasn’t stopped the superhero machine from chugging along. Black Widow’s release was delayed, so it will be a few months before we get the next phase of the MCU, and despite the fact that Wonder Woman 84 was pushed to fall and production on Matt Reeves’s The Batman, starring Robert Pattinson, has been delayed, DC has been making news behind the scenes.

First, HBO Max announced their plans to release the Snydercut next year, and then details emerged about the long-awaited Flash movie. The most interesting nugget? That Michael Keaton will be reprising his role as Batman in a co-starring part as a mentor to the speedy superhero. And now there are whispers that DC has plans to bring another former Batman back into the fold.

The rumors, which Cosmic Book News reports first appeared on 4chan but have since been supported by leaks in other places, like The Cultured Nerd, suggest that Ben Affleck has already signed a deal with HBO Max to re-appear as Bruce Wayne and his vigilante alter-ego in future films related to Zack Snyder’s Justice League.

“Ben has indeed signed a new contract and he is coming back,” claims Taylor Murphy of The Cultured Nerd. “The official announcement is expected to happen either at DC FanDome or during JusticeCon. One of the two, we’re going to get that announcement but it’s going to happen before September. We’re going to get the official announcement and we are going to get the Snyderverse Batman is going to be returning.”

Murphy suggests that Affleck is returning because he is fully on-board with Zack Snyder’s vision, and now that Snyder’s Batman is back, so is Ben. Apparently, DC doesn’t see a conflict between the three Batmans – Affleck’s, Keaton’s, and Pattinson’s – and that part of the idea is for multiple Batmans to exist within a broader DC multiverse.

“They are bringing everybody back,” says Murphy. “This is planned… This is a design because of Zack. This is a plan that they’re moving forward with. I mean, I keep saying it is a great time to be a DC fan.”

It’s certainly might be if any of this is true. It’s hard to know, and until – and unless – an official announcement is made, it’s probably best to take this all with a grain of salt. After all, Affleck has spoken about the difficult time he had portraying Batman in Justice League, and he may not have any interest in revisiting the role.

But with the Snydercut on the way, and Keaton and Pattinson already on-board, it’s not that difficult to imagine DC bringing in a third Batman, and differentiating themselves from the MCU with a Batman triple-play. Hopefully Hollywood gets back to business soon so we can find out.

At the very least, three Batmans would give fans a lot to argue about!

“My dad worked third-shift his whole life. He was exhausted most of the time and we didn’t have a lot of money, but he literally gave me everything I needed, and a lot of what I wanted.

In 2011, he passed away unexpectedly. When I reflect back, it’s not the material things he gave me that I remember most.

It’s wanting to hang out with him after his 12-hour night shifts. It’s him unselfishly taking me to the park after buying me a kite, even though he hadn’t slept in almost 24 hours. It’s the times he sacrificed sleep to watch my basketball games and support me during his small window of rest on Saturday mornings.

It’s the times his last dollar bought me back-to-school clothes and an old car that I could drive on my own to school. It’s his constant reassurances that he was fine, despite his health problems, just so I wouldn’t worry about him when I knew he was in pain.

It’s him preparing me for the day that he wouldn’t be here.

And it’s knowing he was there with me, long after he’d passed, as I nervously welcomed my son into the world in 2019. His presence reassured me that we would be okay.

He was the best dad, and the dad I someday hope to be.”

– Aaron Chandler

Want to share a story about fatherhood? Email [email protected]

Check out the previous editions of Father Figures here.

For the uninitiated, “pop art” was a movement that emerged in the 1950s in which artists created bold, colorful, vivid depictions of familiar subjects, from celebrities to comic books to the everyday mundane. You probably know the style best from the time Andy Warhol painted 32 cans of Campbell’s tomato soup.

Now LEGO, who recently announced upcoming sets based on Home Alone and Seinfeld, is launching a line of LEGO Art products that will allow you to create stunning works of pop art. Each set costs $120, and includes a canvas, build guide booklet, and all the bead-like pieces you’ll need to assemble such iconic subjects as…

Marilyn Monroe

Build the iconic Andy Warhol print of Marilyn Monroe. This is LEGO ART. 🔥 https://t.co/SFoHdnp62o pic.twitter.com/HhNbCuzzV6

— LEGO (@LEGO_Group) July 1, 2020

Darth Vader

The Beatles

and Iron Man!

Some sets allow you to make multiple pieces of art. For example, you can make various versions of Iron Man’s suit, while the Sith kit shows you how to make Darth Vader, Darth Maul, and Kylo Ren.

And it gets better! Also included in each set is a unique QR code that, when scanned, provides you with a soundtrack you can listen to while you build. You can also combine canvasses to make even bigger, beadier, more badass pieces pop art to hang in your living space. The sets are expected to hit toy shelves on August 1st internationally and September 1st in the United States.

Your move, Mega Bloks!

Beer: It’s what’s for breakfast. We’ve already showcased Lucky Charms beer and one with Fruity Pebbles in it. Well, the hits keep on coming. Remember that episode of The Simpsons where Homer asks Apu for some Skittlebrau, a fake beer he imagined with candy floating in it?

Well, Homer’s dream has finally been actualized some twenty-odd years later. This month, the Pontoon Brewery in Sandy Springs, Georgia is bringing back its sweetest concoction: Rainbow Smiggles, a Berliner Weisse made with both Trix and Skittles, as well as strawberries, pineapple, vanilla. Also lactose, the sugar found in milk, to really nail down the illusion you’re getting loaded on cereal.

Pontoon Brewery has teamed up with The Sprayberry Bottle Shop to bring us this German sour which, once in the mixer, is infused with 500 pounds of Skittles and more than 100 boxes of Trix cereal.

We’ve seen more than our fair share of novelty beer labels in the last year. DuClaw Brewing Company released one based on the dad bod. More recently, Sheetz, a popular Pennsylvanian restaurant/convenience store, knocked it out of the park with their craft brew made from hot dogs. But, we gotta say, these Rainbow Smiggles are truly something to behold.

Head brewer Chris Baratz told Thrillist that Pontoon Brewing is committed to bringing craft beer enthusiasts exciting new flavors month after month. “We like to push the limits and go to extremes to keep the brewers and customers excited about each new sour.”

The last round sold out within 45 minutes at a small, in-brewery launch, so they made way more Rainbow Smiggles this summer. It is now available for pre-order right here on CraftCellr! Drink responsibly, silly rabbit.

When Jason Hartanov’s daughter sent him a picture of their house after it had been TP’d, she apologized and offered to help him clean it up. He had a different feeling…a giant THANK YOU to the kids responsible.

In a Facebook post that has since gone viral and been shared more than 1,000 times, the dad of four thanked the kids for restoring his hope in the youth. “Thank you for making me smile and reminding me of the best days of my childhood,” he wrote. “Thank you for giving us all a break from the issues in this world and thank you for finding a great use of the excess toilet paper people bought during COVID.”

He also thanked the kids for being kids and embracing that life is short, so we should all have fun. However, he had some pretty steep complaints about their parents.

“This is shoddy TP-ing work,” he wrote. “We should be ashamed. We need to teach out youth about doing things with excellence, and focusing on the details.”

He then gave some advice for the kids who did the job, advising them to use more TP because “the roof has little to no paper, the trees are too bare and you left half-rolls sitting on the ground.”

And, well, wouldn’t you know it, his house got his again later that week. Jason was still a bit unimpressed, so he mocked up a visual to help the perps do better on their next try.

He did say he loved the kids because of “their desire to improve” because they “are doing adventures instead of watching adventures.”

He said he has hope for this generation, but that they need to learn a thing or two from their parents.

“We would have been embarrassed to leave such a clean mess,” he wrote. “More TP. More people. BURY THE HOUSE IN TP! Ask your parents, we took pride in EPIC TP battles.”

Nothing is more dad than laughing at your own jokes. Here are our 12 personal favorites from last month. (Actually as voted by you, based on Facebook engagement.)

1. Dad Tax

2. Dad Rocks

3. Grilled

4. Getting Serious

5. Vengeance 

6. Freedom

7. Proper

8. Reboot

9. Dark Ages

10. Not a Lot to Ask

11. Summer Dadding

12. Junior Millionaire 

Check out last month’s top memes here.